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These are harmful stereotypes that will not only make your black partner uncomfortable, they will further marginalize them.
Unfortunately, that wasn’t the first or last awkward date I’ve had with a white man.
So in order to combat the harmful stereotypying of our people, try to compliment us without the caveat! It’s assumed that that everyone belonging to that group thinks and behaves the same way, but that is never – – the case.
When getting to know a black woman, don’t ask them to be the authority on black culture.
Instead, remember that black women, like all people, have varying interests, backgrounds, and obstacles that they face daily.
Try to think of a black woman as an individual, and not as the chosen speaker for a whole diverse group.
While it may be hard for two people from widely different intersections of race and gender to understand each other, it’s not impossible once the more privileged party (in this case, the white guy) is able to recognize their shortcomings and how the intersections of race and gender affect every aspect of a black woman’s life.
A white man must be willing to work toward a better understanding of how race and gender intersect differently for everyone, and he must also be prepared to speak out against the injustices that their partners will endure.We ended up hitting it off, but it wasn’t until our first date that I realized I had underestimated the wingman’s abilities.The guy did, in fact, have some kind of black girl fetish.So, in order to avoid some head and heartaches down the road for both parties, I’d like to offer white men some suggestions on how to best approach us.This won’t apply to every black woman, but it wouldn’t hurt to infuse some intersectional feminism into your game.Intersectionality would help because it’s an understanding that a person’s experiences are shaped by their gender, race, physical ability, and socioeconomic class, to name a few factors.